Border Patrol: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

  • Δημοσιεύτηκε στις 7 Αύγ 2017
  • Donald Trump's plan to hire more Border Patrol agents could lead to more corruption and misconduct. If only their recruitment ads were designed to attract the most suitable applicants.
    Connect with Last Week Tonight online...
    Subscribe to the Last Week Tonight GRclip channel for more almost news as it almost happens:
    Find Last Week Tonight on Facebook like your mom would:
    Follow us on Twitter for news about jokes and jokes about news:
    Visit our official site for all that other stuff at once:
  • ΔιασκέδασηΔιασκέδαση

Σχόλια • 7 691

  • I've GoneAway
    I've GoneAway Πριν 5 ώρες

    That's a chimp

  • tickety boo
    tickety boo Πριν ημέρα

    John Oliver still not as funny as Andy Zaltzman

  • Enraged Nerd
    Enraged Nerd Πριν 4 ημέρες +1

    Something tells me you need to revisit this topic.

  • Peege Clarke
    Peege Clarke Πριν 6 ημέρες

    Get a 308 .
    Find a grassy knoll.
    Then when dumpty gets in range..

  • Scramator *
    Scramator * Πριν 7 ημέρες

    It would be great if you could understand this because having a great understanding of Spanish is fundamental for this job.

  • Rendy De Schryver
    Rendy De Schryver Πριν 8 ημέρες

    english fucking bastards

  • Rendy De Schryver
    Rendy De Schryver Πριν 8 ημέρες

    this is the second video where this bastard, offending Belgium

  • Frederik MHz
    Frederik MHz Πριν 9 ημέρες

    Boring Patrol.

  • Icon Canada
    Icon Canada Πριν 9 ημέρες

    WHAT AN IDIOT. People are dying you wanker.

  • william willie
    william willie Πριν 9 ημέρες +1

    The border Patrol kill migrants by dumping water left by good Samaritans.

  • Max Hallberg
    Max Hallberg Πριν 10 ημέρες

    thats legit will arnett doing the voice over

  • Tim Butler
    Tim Butler Πριν 10 ημέρες

    Long live AMLO and Bernie Sanders!

  • Brian D
    Brian D Πριν 10 ημέρες

    Something tells me being an employee of the border patrol is one big Donald Trump orgasm fest.
    I'm sure if anybody down there says or questions this building the wall or family separation or cages with aluminum blankets or Obamacare is a good thing they'll find themselves with bad employee reviews bad shifts at work, deny vacation leave when they want it, other employees who look at them with skepticism and block them out of being a part of.
    That's what happens when you allow a whole bunch of people from one sector to be employed.
    I work in a place full of Latina women with a Bible between their knees. What a mess that was. One woman's outrage and scorn to prove her chastity cannot be outdone by the next woman who has even more Chastity and outrage that there's a disgusting man in the room.
    Now let's all watch the news for the bad man report about how men are disgusting horrible perverts who are violent and women are angry victims..

  • John Dwyer
    John Dwyer Πριν 12 ημέρες

    Just one piece of unimportant trivia...Red Delicious apples used to be delicious and firm and crispy and then people started trying to make them "redder" . They were red, but they were more mottled than all red so naturally someone had to fix something that wasn't broken. Now they are very red and are crap as apples go.

  • Rey Barrera
    Rey Barrera Πριν 14 ημέρες +3

    People seem to ignore that drugs come into the states via boats, submarines and fckn airplanes. Not through mules

  • tej226
    tej226 Πριν 14 ημέρες

    Him shaking the foil took me out 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • Anthony Gonzales
    Anthony Gonzales Πριν 15 ημέρες +1

    Everything in america is a shit and now I agree when the world says that this country is a shit hole, worst and corrupted country..

  • Eagledives
    Eagledives Πριν 15 ημέρες

    Ocasio-Cortez’s ( a.k.a ' Donkey Teeth ' ) anti-capitalist mentality drove Amazon out of NYC. In her own delusional mind you don't need business, because the government is going to take care of you. AOC ( America's Outright Communist ) is the Democrat version of Marie Antoinette. She drove thousands of high paying, quality Amazon jobs away from her constituents and essentially told them, "Why eat cake, when you can have crumbs?" McDowell ( Fox News Host ) is correct ! She stopped a minimum of 25,000 jobs paying approximately $150,000 each and now she is bragging and deceiving others about helping people get better min pay. This AOC woman is dangerous for America. ( This essay was sent to all Border Agents before they exposed AOC in Facebook, WELL DONE GUYS ! ) - The Facebook Border Agents are Heroes !
    Ocasio-Cortez really believes that she is qualified for any type government position, much less the position of a representative of her state?!! That fact does not say much for her state and much less for the people who voted for her!! That is the joke of the month, maybe even the year!!!!! On second thought, Miss Ocasio-Cortez is the joke of the year!!!!
    The only reason why AOC ( America's Outright Communist ) get so much notice is people are paying "news" agencies and members of Congress to do so. She has zero understanding of economics, supposedly her strong suit. She is simply nothing more than a loud-mouthed teenager who keeps declaring the most outrageous things to keep herself in the spotlight, a true LOW IQ SOCIAL MEDIA SENSATION. Why would any senior member of Congress consider her opinion in any other light than that of a child that has been given too much too soon. Pelosi needs to completely sideline her until after 2020 for the sake of the party and Biden needs to ignored her completely.
    The photographer who took the photos of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez appearing to cry at a protest outside a "tent city" in Tornillo, Texas demanded the removal of the images after it was revealed that AOC was actually crying over little more than a few police officers and an empty parking lot as part of a stunt.

    Earlier this week, we highlighted the fact that Ocasio-Cortez was clearly trying to mislead the public when she tweeted, "I saw with my own eyes" America was "becoming a nation that steals refugee children from their parents, & caged them."

    Numerous other photos taken at the scene show that there was no "Tent City" or any detained children in AOC’s view. Her emotional reaction to precisely nothing illustrates how the entire stunt was part of a photo-op designed to emotionally manipulate the public.

    Photographer Ivan Pierre Aguirre, who shot and tweeted four images from the event that AOC subsequently retweeted, demanded the images be removed.

    Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is fundamentally dishonest!
    AOC aligns herself with Ilhan Omar ( big mistake ). Ilhan Omar is the mouthpiece for CAIR. What is CAIR? Answer: "Since its founding in 1993, the Council for American Islamic Relations (CAIR) has presented itself publicly as a benign Muslim American 'civil rights organization.' CAIR is an un-indicted co-conspirator of the Holyland Foundation, it was Obama/Holder that ended the prosecutions & obstructed the Congressional investigations.
    From that time to this, however, the United States government has known that CAIR actually is an entity founded by the Muslim Brotherhood’s Palestinian franchise: Hamas, a group officially designated since 1994 as a terrorist organization. Ms Omar doesn't need President Trump to incite violence toward her. Her own words do that all by itself. Omar has no moral clarity and courage, no respect for the Americans that died on 9/11, therefore she should not be in Congress. Americans will not stand by the sidelines and will never forget 9/11.
    The 'Green New Deal' was a pipe dream. How do they throw together such an enormous proposal that is unrealistically radical much less nearly impossible and expect support. If you really want to make a difference for climate change do some research, get some experts input. It seems they were all just sitting around the campfire throwing out ideas like a bunch of immature pre-teens. It is much more of a disservice to the wasted time of due process for not supplying credible facts and realistic goals.
    Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's 'Green New Deal' is impractical. Without China and India's cooperation, her plan would not work and the United States would be bankrupt. Since she has a degree in economics, she needs to tell us in unambiguous terms how much her plan would cost the United States. She has not done this, instead, she talks in generalities and without proven support for her ideas.
    She has talking points and questions written so it sounds good but she can't go back and forth and debate. She can't refute and rebut. She's got her script and acts the words out but she doesn't think critically. She's a parrot.
    This is called being shortsighted. The social democrats don't see the full picture. They don't see that sometimes the long-term consequences of a decision outweighs the immediate gratification. Socialism sounds good in theory. We all would love if everything were free. Eventually you will run out of other people’s money
    She lacks the breadth in basic understanding needed to perform her job; a product of the modern dysfunctional education/indoctrination system that values emotionalism and anti establishment over logic. A blatant, "progressive" diversity hire.

    She is a socialist, dystopian, motor-mouth who will create equality by bringing abject poverty to everyone. She is possibly less stupid than the delusional people who think she will benefit them somehow, at least in the short term. If she gets reelected that will show that the era of Idiocracy is fully upon us.
    AOC is a one term House Representative. She probably won't get reelected, she is totally incompetent with no leadership qualities and no merits especially after the fiasco with Amazon in NY that she helped create.
    AOC, like Sanders and most far left, socialist 'progressives', don't seem to understand that US environmental policies end at the US border. We in the US have ZERO control over what happens in other high consumer/ consumption countries : Canada, Mexico, South/Central America, China, India, Europe, South Africa, Australia and so on.
    Unless the environmental policies needed to reverse the damaging affects of carbon emissions are adopted globally, draconian domestic ones will have almost no effect on the total earth environment.

    The moderates understand that reality. If AOC and the progressives were smart and did the comprehensive and thorough research require and ditched the alarmist mentality, they might push for legislation that encourages and rewards technological , scientific, engineering innovation towards green technologies, developed from public/private partnerships through research and development.
    Those new green technologies could then be exported to the rest of the world, presented and promoted through the United Nations, thus benefiting everyone on this earth and to all future generations, including the US.
    Things like that might easily pass through Congress. But it's much easier to sell the doom and gloom environmental apocalypse to the other progressives socialists, without any thought of the economic impact and drastic consequences. AOC approach to the solution to an environmental global problem is not only reckless but it is irresponsible and mediocre.
    WAKE UP America :Watch the video on you tube called "The Brains Behind AOC" to understand how she was elected to congress and is managed by a special interest group. Yahoo is censoring the link so look it up.
    She asked once , "Why Are You So Obsessed With Me?", Here is why :
    AOC Quotes, word for word : "When you put bread in the toaster, toast comes out...but where does the bread go?" "If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches? "We need to invent technology that’s never been invented yet…" When Pelosi arranged for AOC to chair a committee, she said, "I'm a member of Congress. I don't arrange chairs!" Ms. Ocasio-Cortez also loves to state: 'I'm the boss. How about that?' "We can land a rover on the sun at night when it’s cooler." "And if the presses can’t print money fast enough, just get like one of those fast copy machines."
    She has talking points and questions written so it sounds good but she can't go back and forth and debate. She can't refute and rebut. She's got her script and acts the words out but she doesn't think critically. She's a parrot.
    This is called being shortsighted. The social democrats don't see the full picture. They don't see that sometimes the long term consequences of a decision outweighs the immediate gratification. Socialism sounds good in theory. We all would love if everything were free. Eventually you will run out of other people’s money

    She lacks the breadth in basic understanding needed to perform her job; a product of the modern dysfunctional education/indoctrination system that values emotionalism and anti establishment mentality over logic. A blatant, "progressive" diversity hire.

    She is a socialist, dystopian, motor-mouth who will create equality by bringing abject poverty to everyone. She is possibly less stupid than the delusional people who think she will benefit them somehow, at least in the short term. If she gets reelected that will show that the era of Idiocracy is fully upon us.

    • FAD
      FAD Πριν 2 ημέρες

      Quality Amazon jobs!? YGTBFJ! Why don't you run for Congress since you seem to possess a motor-mouth yourself? You couldn't hold an intelligent conversation with her if your life depended on it. She's out of your league, buddy.

    • Stephen2462
      Stephen2462 Πριν 7 ημέρες

      Lol, someone's repressed.

  • Ryker Holmes
    Ryker Holmes Πριν 15 ημέρες

    Hey will arnet

  • IWillTakeAGuranteeOfBetterOverAPromiseOfPerfect

    "We ask all our guests at this zoo to refrain from fingering armadillos, buttering turtles or selling drugs to penguins"

  • Re-Play Games
    Re-Play Games Πριν 16 ημέρες

    Do I hear Will Arnett in that ending bit?

  • Kyle Mouttet
    Kyle Mouttet Πριν 16 ημέρες

    5:19 - it is the job of the heli unit to fly 10ft off the ground.. because flying higher would only be safer and significantly more effective, but we live on the edge out here on the edge.

  • BulletproofKam
    BulletproofKam Πριν 17 ημέρες

    Why does JOHN Oliver think he’s american! He’s british no matter what he thinks, and I’m starting to hate JOHN now, he just does the same shit all the time.

    • Stephen2462
      Stephen2462 Πριν 17 ημέρες +3

      He lives here now lol. He has just as much reason to be concerned about these issues as anyone born here.

  • cookiesforshorts
    cookiesforshorts Πριν 19 ημέρες +1

    Polygraphs do not work. They're a redundant intimidation tactic. I agree with John, but that shouldn't be part of the hiring process.

  • Manbearpig
    Manbearpig Πριν 19 ημέρες

    Polygraph tests are complete and total bullshit, folks. They do not measure deception, they measure anxiety and stress. I won't go into details, but do your own research on it and you'll understand why this is my opinion.

    Fun fact: Ted Bundy passed his polygraph test. So did Gary Leon Ridgway, the deadliest serial killer in US. history.

  • jd noll
    jd noll Πριν 23 ημέρες

    Border Patrol:
    Detained me. Used legal “torture” tactics to question me. Stole my vehicle and money. Left me in the desert, in the middle of the night(next to a greyhound station).
    Not a fan

  • Eric DeRiggi
    Eric DeRiggi Πριν 23 ημέρες

    he does know that those thermal blankets were given to the astronauts because the amount of heat that they can create right he's not going to make an issue out of that is he

  • Larven Karlsson
    Larven Karlsson Πριν 23 ημέρες

    Lol polygraphtests?! Did they check their horoscopes too...?! 😂

    xZANZIBARZx Πριν 25 ημέρες

    That cartel pistol was cherry!
    *Our border patrol exists because we are being ARTIFICIALLY FLOODED with 3rd world soros funded caravans*
    _The Triggered Intellectual Show with John Oliver_
    *H0nk H0nk*

  • Rob Nowe
    Rob Nowe Πριν 25 ημέρες

    Here is a great video on the border wall...βίντεο.html

  • David Kee
    David Kee Πριν 25 ημέρες

    I have been where the 16 year old was shot

  • william willie
    william willie Πριν 25 ημέρες

    Why does he keep saying our country? The US split with the UK in 1776.

    • Stephen2462
      Stephen2462 Πριν 19 ημέρες +2

      He's a permanent resident. He lives here now lol.

  • A S
    A S Πριν 25 ημέρες +1

    I love the Dora the Exploradora backpack that one lil girl has

  • fougee1
    fougee1 Πριν 29 ημέρες

    F**K this guy ! Why is it that a large percent of these people have a English accent?

    • Ian Muir
      Ian Muir Πριν 14 ημέρες

      fougee1 So you can get a better understanding of the English Language dummy

  • Philip Frandsen
    Philip Frandsen Πριν μήνα +2

    The Supreme Court has ruled that polygraphs are unreliable.

  • Philip Frandsen
    Philip Frandsen Πριν μήνα

    John Oliver praises the border patrol, then criticizes the idea of having more. Just pandering to the left.

    • Stephen2462
      Stephen2462 Πριν 19 ημέρες +2

      He also gave a long and entertaining explanation of the likely consequences of expanding it. Way to completely ignore that.

  • alflurin
    alflurin Πριν μήνα

    Really, the US is still using polygraphs!?? It is not reliable and should not be used! I'm sure that the border patrol has enough veteran agents and psychologist to profile their candidates.

  • Lace 7
    Lace 7 Πριν μήνα +2

    That job actually seems awesome, just chilling in a desert all day.

    • Spartan Life
      Spartan Life Πριν 15 ημέρες

      Lace 7 you can do basically the same thing but in Alaska if you join the state troopers up there

  • Windy Hawthorn
    Windy Hawthorn Πριν μήνα

    My mama once was asked for a bribe when she was crossing the border and being intimated. But they stopped when they recognized my dad. Not because my dad is involved with all that crap. But that his Mexican side of the family are well know and liked. And he had been crossing the border since he was a baby. He's the most unlikely person you would think is half Mexican due to the fact that at six-foot-six blond green-eyed light skinned most people are surprised that he can correct Spanish grammar. I blame his English teachers they managed to be one of two people his whole life a Mr and Mrs from school to college. And I can still see there affect in this community from the poor to the rich they have great English skills. It rubbed off on how seriously he took his Spanish. Though to be honest he always claimed that he knew very little Spanish and could only ask where's the bathroom. Order cheese salt salt and a beer. This is also what he claimed was the only thing he could say in Hebrew when he visited Israel and I Know the Hebrew one is true. It's a long-standing joke of his.
    But leave him with an American who speaks Spanish and he points out there bad grammar. And I know he's always right because their grandma always confirms. I don't speak Spanish so people don't believe me when I say grandma Mexican. She spoke 9 languages people.

  • Amy Demetros
    Amy Demetros Πριν μήνα


  • Jason Brown
    Jason Brown Πριν μήνα +1

    That commercial at the end 😂

  • Dafoodmaster
    Dafoodmaster Πριν μήνα

    Fake news! Trump's favorite ice cream flavor is cherry.

  • Gloomy Blackfur
    Gloomy Blackfur Πριν μήνα

    Polygraphs are completely worthless. They tell you absolutely nothing. You might as well read applicants' palms.

  • Bender's Shinymetalass
    Bender's Shinymetalass Πριν μήνα

    Trump should ask his supporters to make a man wall, holding hands all along the border.. .. cheap, and everybody's happy

  • Toxxik
    Toxxik Πριν μήνα

    of course they failed the test. polygraphs were never made to detect lies, in fact the inventor viewed creating them as the single worst thing he'd ever done because we stubbornly stick to using them despite being aware they don't do that they're incredibly easy to pass

  • Jessie B
    Jessie B Πριν μήνα

    Its not the drugs coming over the boarder that kills most people its these legal drugs given out by doctors I was on drugs at one point I didn't know anyone taking "illegal" drugs every one I knew that were on drugs or died from drugs it was stuff given out by doctors

  • Josiah Hockenberry
    Josiah Hockenberry Πριν μήνα +1

    As a stay stay at home dad of 4, who drives a Honda Odyssey, I would love to be in a quiet nowhere doing nothing🙂

  • queenofichigo
    queenofichigo Πριν μήνα

    Polygraph tests don't work though. . .

  • inuhaichi666
    inuhaichi666 Πριν μήνα

    A guy that smokes weed around 5 times a day will definitely be able to deal with abject boredom.

  • Tom van himbeeck
    Tom van himbeeck Πριν μήνα

    Is that Bojack Horseman?

  • Lupe Castillo
    Lupe Castillo Πριν μήνα

    Where's your f****** donation check the President Trump you're a pussy

  • T -Bird
    T -Bird Πριν μήνα

    What is the real reason behind border patrol in the wall?βίντεο.html

  • Tink Ertime
    Tink Ertime Πριν μήνα

    Ah yes, John Oliver, another non citizen that has his own wall heard from!

  • Zed Ayy
    Zed Ayy Πριν μήνα +2

    Oh my god Will Arnett! I knew that voice was recognizable!

  • Malek Karim
    Malek Karim Πριν μήνα

    John oliver is wrong

  • rocky
    rocky Πριν μήνα

    John oliver is an awakening to our imbeciles in our country. Wake up america and get educated and more importantly re educated. . .

  • warmswimmer
    warmswimmer Πριν μήνα +1

    They should get Thornclaw involved. He'll sort this out.

  • Rae H
    Rae H Πριν μήνα

    Props to whoever did the CC!

  • Jason Orefice
    Jason Orefice Πριν μήνα

    The corrupt smaller population of border patrol gives the ones that are good a bad name

  • Penelope Sorrentino
    Penelope Sorrentino Πριν μήνα +1

    Why wouldn’t he call it cuckcakes

  • Surtu
    Surtu Πριν μήνα

    Polygraph detectors work. They basically measure how nervous and agitated you're getting as a result of questioning. Certain people will not get agitated by questioning-this is absolutely true, there are definitely sociopaths out there. But they're few in number, so most people who've committed crimes will start exceeding the 'normal' threshold for the test really fast while lying, prompting a follow-up Q&A about their unusual results, and allowing you to weed out large numbers of candidates.

  • Surtu
    Surtu Πριν μήνα +1

    Can the Border Patrol please use this as its recruitment material, because it's perfectly amazing XD

  • chris huddleston
    chris huddleston Πριν μήνα +1

    Is that bojack horseman at the end talking?

  • cameron 1422
    cameron 1422 Πριν μήνα +1


    MNRAZORBACK Πριν μήνα

    Given the surge in illegal crossings, the basis for the argument that we don't need more agents has not aged well.

  • first last
    first last Πριν 2 μήνες

    But everything I've heard is that lie detectors are not reliable, which is why they aren't admissible in court. Because of course most of the judicial system as well as many other things would be rendered irrelevant if you could reliably determine if someone was lying. I mean sure if they are thoughtful enough to confess to things, it could be useful for frightening people but still...

  • Two Roaches
    Two Roaches Πριν 2 μήνες

    Polygraph tests are bull shit. They only text resperations, persperation, and blood pressure. That's why polygraph tests are not admissable in court. They are psudoscience at best. Even the creator of the polygraph regrets making it seeing how police were using it.

  • ZanesFacebook
    ZanesFacebook Πριν 2 μήνες

    I still think my idea is the best.
    Private investors buying land on the border, building a wall of apartments.
    Employ those workers. Have them build the apartments and maintain the apartments. Employ them, give them jobs, and help them gain legal citizenship.
    Then we'll be overrun with a crop of laborers that can help others boost their property value.
    Now you have a decently skilled worker who can do a job that's wanted by "Americans" while also building personal wealth and helping them become legal

  • Dante Monte
    Dante Monte Πριν 2 μήνες +1

    John Oliver does it again!
    He’s the BEST!
    “Circus Fuckers Need NOT Apply”.

  • Firesondiego
    Firesondiego Πριν 2 μήνες

    19:20 says “It would be great if you understood this, because to have a good level of Spanish is fundamental for this job.”